2amfix.net

It’s over. Joey and I broke up last night – well I did most of the breaking up. But I think our relationship has never been better since last night.

Sure, I was pissed I didn’t get more of a reaction from him. If he had actually fought for me – that’s what would have kept me with him. But I realized after I talked to him for a second time last night that he always understood I deserved better than what he was able to give me emotionally. Well, he said as much.

“I always felt guilty that I couldn’t love you the way you wanted and deserved to be loved. I’m happy for you. Maybe it just hasn’t hit me yet, but I really am happy that you’re moving on in life. I’ve been in love before, and I don’t think I can do it again. You deserve to feel that at least once in your life.”

When it came down to it… I was always going to be a 21 year old girl to him. He has always been looking out for me. He didn’t mind being with me if that’s what I wanted, and he doesn’t mind letting me go if it’s in my best interest. And I’m really just grateful that I had this companion, this partner… helping me for the past two years; helping me grow and being my rock to lean on in times of tragedy.

He’s my best friend. And I know that’s never going to change. He’s always going to be part of my life – watching and protecting me. I’m always going to be part of his. I’m always going to be here to support him. But he realized that this was an opportunity to put his own growth for the past two years to the test. He said he needed to stop depending on me and stand on his own two feet. I want to be there for that. I want to see him have the success he deserves in life.

Just as his slightly younger friend…