2amfix.net

So February 14 is quickly approaching, and that dire need to pound the founder of V-Day’s sorry ass through 6 solid feet of concrete is already here. Mind you, the lucky bastard’s probably already dead, but if we could resurrect him for just a moment, I’d be happy to send him right back. I mean, sure you could probably brush off the waves of intense bitterness radiating from my body, as I write, as the bitchings of a bitterly psychotic woman – OR — I could guide you through the wilderness I generally refer to as my thought process in an effort to allow you to see reason. Personally, the latter appeals more, so through the wilderness we shall go.

V-Day, more commonly known as Valentines Day, is the special day each year where prospective and existing couples around the world make an active effort in displaying the love, affection, and gratitude each harbor for the other. Right? Wrong.

Fine, then lets try again.

V-Day, more commonly known as Commercialism Appreciation Day, is the profit happy 24 hours each year where the stupidity of humankind unite in perpetuating commercialism’s biggest joke through the purchase of ridiculously overpriced Valentine’s Day paraphernalia. Right? Wrong, but you’re getting close.

Last try.

V-Day, more commonly known as Single’s Awareness Day, is the not so secret annual conspiracy created for the sadistic of society’s pleasure through the forced realization of unintentional intimate isolation often followed by an acute increase in single’s suicide rates. Right? Bingo.

Yah digg?